Trading Places

One of our favorite things about our new school is the fact that they place a high focus on the development of the whole student, rather than merely focusing on curriculum. They have put systems in place to help guide students with emotional, physical, and character growth issues. In this light, our school has adopted a policy of a theme every year. This year’s theme focuses on the idea of compassion.

Throughout the year, we have focused school assemblies, activities, community events, and even classroom lessons on the aspect of compassion, and the focus of growing compassion within our school community. I specifically say our school community because it’s not just the students who are targeted with the focus of developing compassion. School administration, teachers, and staff members are a part of this growth process too. While our students have character education lessons and community service involvement tied to the theme of compassion, the teachers approached it from a different lens. Our task was very literally to step in the shoes of another teacher to develop our own appreciation for the various roles of staff members from across our school. At least, this is the justification I have come to understand, and the reason that for a day, that long long day where I became a third grade teacher for a day. We would be living the movie Trading Places for a day.

Prior to 3 Day (chosen by me for its resemblance to D Day), I was absolutely intimidated. Throughout my career, I have taught middle school or high school students. I chose those age ranges for a multitude of reasons. I find that I can utilize my own sense of sarcastic humor in class with them, I identify with some of their personal interests, and I can relate to them on a different level than I ever could with a younger kid. When I heard about my matchup with a third grade class, I instantly had visions of all of the horrors depicted in the movie Kindergarten Cop.

About a week prior to the swap, I visited her class to see the kids I would be teaching and to see her in action. I’m glad I did. I saw some of the tricks an elementary school teacher uses like choral responses the kids responded to, and heard some of the kindest feedback possible. Every conversation with the kids was phrased to “Friends” or “Helpful partners” and the like. That visit gave me valuable insight and context into what I would have to say that day in order to make it through. A few days before the swap, I finalized my lesson plans and reviewed them with the woman who would be teaching my high school students for the day. She was equally intimidated. We reviewed the game plans we had put together and committed to get through it as best as we could. I naturally thought she had an easier day ahead of her than I did. She obviously thought the same for me.
When the day came, I showed up early and went to the classroom to review the plan one more time. My partner was meticulously detailed with her plan, which helped immensely. I resolved to follow it as best as I could, but I was going to be satisfied if I got through the day without injury, or losing a kid.

When they came in, I put on my best kind “talkin’ to the kids” voice and used as many “friends” and smiley adjectives as I could. They were 7 and 8 and they could see right through it. Nonetheless, I managed to work my way through the first lesson, then the second. As I had them seated on the carpet for a reading lesson, I caught a kid from the side of my eye and watched him. I continued to read my story about poison dart frogs to the kids while glancing up periodically to see him squirming and hiding his hands as he wrote or drew something. I paid attention to him but didn’t call him out for fear of losing the attention of my audience as I profiled the dangers of poison dart frogs. After the lesson, I dismissed them to their seats to read their own stories about something or another and I went to check on the kid who I had noticed.

As I approached him, he tried to hide a pile of colorful Post-Its. I looked at them and they were full of third grade profanity. Words like “butt” “penis” “naked” and “fart” littered the pages. I laughed audibly and told him I was taking his papers and I redirected him to his reading area. I thought that would be the end of it. Boy was I wrong.

Throughout the day, as I managed to get through a writing lesson, a math lesson, and recess. I noticed the same student writing on more Post-Its. Yup, more elementary school profanity. I confiscated the entire supply of Post-Its hoping it would stop. Somehow more kept popping up on walls, trash cans, desks, and notebooks in different colors. He had a stash!

It didn’t disturb the other students so I was satisfied to capture the notes before others noticed it. Every time, I confronted the kid who admitted to it, apologized, and redirected himself back to his work. Every time, I found different colored bad words strewn about the room.

The rest of the afternoon was relatively uneventful. I took the kids to their specialist classes. I escorted them around to and from lunch. I even had a spirited conversation with one student about the merits of Hogwarts Wizarding School as a viable alternative to elementary school structures. At the end of the day, I escorted them to their designated places. These four go to this classroom for after school activities. These 8 go to this place for bus pickup. These 5 go to this place for parent pickup. It was difficult to keep track of. But alas, I had dropped off the kids and no more were dependent upon me to get home.

I scurried up to the room again, and led an after school activity on art and drawing with first grade students. We drew puppies. It was grand. One student asked me to throw hers away because her parents wouldn’t want it because it was bad. I told her I was sure they would love it, and she insisted it would go in the trash at home anyway since it wasn’t good. That was heartbreaking so I told her I wanted it so I could put it on my refrigerator. She seemed okay with the idea so that was that.
As we were putting the finishing touches on our puppies, the elementary school principal came in to ask me about a young girl from my class. It turns out she was expected in after school activities but was nowhere to be found. I LOST ONE!?!?! He said he would investigate while I carried on coloring puppies, but of course my work was shoddy because I was focused on the human being I misplaced. Then I heard a PA announcement alerting that we were on the lookout for this girl. Great, the principal couldn’t find her. The whole school was alerted, and everyone would know that I couldn’t keep track of a 7 year old.

As I escorted the first graders to their pickup locations, I ran into the principal again and inquired about the girl. It turns out she had walked home (on compound) and she was fine. I was off the hook. I piled up the Post-Its from earlier in the day on the desk of the REAL third grade teacher and went home. I was exhausted. I was full of compassion for her and her day to day plight as a wrangler of wild, adorable, sweet, artistic, wizard loving, profanity laced children. I was excited to be back in my own room the next day, but I had learned quite a bit during my time in third grade.