Women Driving Change

When we first made the decision to move to Saudi Arabia, many of our friends and family members had questions and concerns. If I am being honest, many of the concerns were centered on the idea that Saudi Arabia has a reputation (at least within the US) of practicing cultural norms that are viewed by westerners as oppressive towards women. Some of the common customs pointed out include the mandate of wearing an abaya or covering of hair, supervision requirements of a male guardian, and driving privileges. This post is not about my own views on these practices or perceptions. I have learned long ago, that my interpretation or opinion of cultural practices needs to live in harmony with the rules, customs, and expectations of my host country, for it is a culture and country that is hosting me. That is not what this post is about. This post is about news.

In September, it was announced that women in Saudi Arabia would be allowed to drive. Saudi Arabia was the only country in the world to have such a restriction in place. According to the reports that I have read, the ban on women driving will be lifted in June of this year. The news gained international attention, praise, and acclaim and came to the forefront of news conversations globally when it happened.

This is a decision that has been well received by most international news outlets. To many, it signals a pending period of progress for social customs in Saudi Arabia. There are pockets of conservatives within the country who are against the ruling, but in my reading, and in my conversations with Saudi men and women, and students, it has been largely celebrated.

The move is framed as the first of many moves that will be made by current Crown Prince Mohammed bin Salman who vows to bring a “modern state of Islam” to Saudi Arabia. Who knows what the next few months or years may bring. Uncertainty and change are the only omnipresent forces in politics. Look at the US federal government for proof of that.

The next few months will reportedly be full of adjustments. Some roads will be widened to account for more drivers. Policies and practices will be put into place regarding license acquisition in a country where single men and families travel on errands in separate lines and offices. Logistical problems will be identified and addressed. Plans will be put into place for full time chauffeurs whose livelihood depends on the fact that women don’t drive at the moment. TImes are changing for sure. We feel fortunate to be living in a place where changes are taking place and where conversations are being had about big picture social questions. Countries and communities are often so bogged down in their daily habitual decisions and practices that rarely to social groups, individuals, or governments take a step back and ask the questions centered on what is best for their citizens, their society, their people, and their country. Regardless of what you believe about the changes taking place in Saudi Arabia and from what perspective you examine those decisions, change is happening. We, albeit guests of this country, feel fortunate to be living within a community that is willing to ask the questions worth answering; questions meant to improve society. You can bet your ---that Shannon will be among the first women in Saudi Arabia to drive the streets of this beautiful desert-scape legally with a smile on her face.

Desert Food Trucks

So we’ve finally come up for air. We’re settled a bit. Our home has some stuff in it, our jobs are figured out a bit more, and the general stress that comes from moving across the world has subsided a bit. So I have an opportunity to talk about some of the cool and unique experiences we’ve had in our first few weeks, retroactively. The next few posts will outline those experiences.

On our second week, one of Shannon’s department coworkers threw out the idea that we caravan out for dinner at a little. A group of us (about 12 total) met at the front of the compound and hit the highway. After driving for about ten minutes or so, we came across a flat open field of sand. Which was very much like every other flat open field of sand because we live in a desert. The thing that made this flat sandy field interesting however, was the line of food trucks.

Similar to many other places in the world, these food trucks were set up in rows. The thing that made it unique was the sand and surroundings (obviously) but also the Persian rugs laid out on the ground in front of many of the food trucks. There were outdoor seating “patios” where you could sit and eat.

When we arrived at 8:00pm nothing was open. We had been told that Saudi was very much a night culture. Malls and restaurants were frequently open until very late. We found this to be true when we got to the food truck spot. We walked around for an hour scouting our options, as we were told many of them would open for business at 9. I would say the breakdown of trucks were fairly similar. There were a total of maybe 30 food trucks. Ten of them were selling burgers. Ten of them were selling shawarma. The rest were a mixture. There were salad and veggie places. There were many dessert and coffee spots. By the time things opened and we ate, there were only about 5 options open. The rest were supposed to open at some unidentified time.

At the shawarma place where Shannon ordered her food, she was served by two boys who were running their dad’s truck. One must have been 9 or 10 and the other no older than 13. Neither of them spoke any English and Shannon and I had limited Arabic; limited to pretty much “thank you.” They were very enthusiastic about helping us and adorable in how excited they were. Her shawarma ordering process amounted to him holding up an ingredient and Shannon nodding yes or no. Fistful of lettuce? Yes. Handful of onion? Yes. Questionable unidentified orange sauce? Sure, but only a little.

In the end, we ate delicious food picnic style on the ground. No one around us spoke any English, and none of us Arabic. We ate in peace with a few smiles shared with some of the other patrons. The food was fantastic, and the experience was unique.

Ladies Night Out in Riyadh

Last week I was invited to attend a dinner with the ladies from school. This is an annual event organized by a lovely staff member here. She reserved a bus for the 15 of us and we all met in front of the school right after dismissal, abayas in tow. We headed to Karam Beirut, a Lebanese restaurant, about a 40 minute drive from school, and made it in the doors right before prayer time.

We were seated at a long table in the center of the restaurant. You can imagine the noise and hullabaloo that 15 women can make on an evening out together, and I was a little embarrassed that we may have disrupted the few families that were enjoying a quiet meal before we blew in the doors, with our ponytails and wrinkled abayas and our unabashed laughing. Are we perceived as jovial and gregarious...or loud and obnoxious?

It is common for restaurants to have open seating, as we are accustomed to in the US but to also have private dining booths or even whole separate rooms, divided by a door or a curtain where a family can sit and the women may remove their veils to eat. Though I’ve noticed that some women actually manage to eat by just bringing a fork up under their veil and don’t need to remove anything. I guess the benefit to this method is that you don’t need to bother worrying if you have any food in your teeth. You can see some of these private booths along the sides of our dining table.

The menu, which had been pre-ordered and was to be served family style took about 45 minutes - due to our arrival at the start of prayer. But - when the food was finally served it was spectacular. Suddenly the kitchen doors burst open with 4 servers and the table was suddenly an explosion of salads and olives, pickled vegetables, tabbouleh and fattoush, hummus and babaganoush with pomegranate seeds, steaming fresh pita breads, stuffed grape leaves, grilled chicken, lamb and beef shawarma and halloumi (grilled soft white cheese). And that was just the main course! By the way, it takes a certain skill level to be able to successfully reach across a table of food to dip your bread in some hummus without also dunking the sleeve of your abaya in all the other plates on the way - a skill which none of us have yet mastered…

We sipped on mint lemonades with crushed ice and chatted and laughed so more (though quieter now on account of the mouthfuls of food. And then dessert was served - platters of baklava - sticky with honey and sprinkled with crushed pistachios. And something I’ve never had before - ashta which is a plate of clotted cream drizzled with honey and has the consistency of whipped fluff. Delicious!
There was so much food leftover that we all made “husband boxes” to bring home, so they could sample the feast that was this evening, a gesture which all the husbands surely appreciated.
On the bus ride home I got to chat with a few gals that I hadn’t really known before and that was nice. This was a fun excursion out with some ladies and it looks like we have a “Ladies Pizza Night” coming up in just a few more weeks!

52 Days in Saudi Arabia

We have now been in Saudi Arabia for 52 days and I finally have a moment to sit down and reflect on all that’s happened and all that we’ve done. Since arriving here on August 15th, it’s been a whirlwind of moving in and setting up house, getting things like identification cards and cell phones, and of course - getting back into the classroom and teaching English again. There have been ups and downs and I’ll do my best now to try to recap the major events.

Arrival
We arrived in Riyadh at around midnight local time after approximately 24 hours of straight travel. Needless to say we were mostly brain numb and a bit disoriented. I thought I would have to put on my abaya (that I didn’t yet possess) as soon as I deplaned but this was not the case. Plenty of other women were walking around in normal clothes. I was afraid that I would possibly be looked at with unkindness or in the very least curiosity, but this was not the case. No one took any interest in another westerner at the airport.

While waiting for our luggage at the carousel I noticed a large advertisement for a fashion clothing company. The photo was cropped so that the woman’s head was not shown, so it was really just a tunic style blouse. But I notice the model’s bare hands had been blurred out and I found this strange. We collected our suitcases and were met right outside of customs by a welcoming committee from the school. They had two vans waiting for us and we climbed right in. I was still in my normal clothes, no abaya.

The First Two Weeks
This part is largely a blur of trips to the grocery store, trips to the hardware and home furnishing stores and everything in between to get our home set up and feeling like home. Since our villa was already fully furnished with an equipped kitchen and basic linens, these were superfluous purchases, but rugs and plants and colorful pillows go a long way in making a home more homey. We made fast friends with the other two childless couples we came in with, and the six of us stuck to close to each other during this time. Also, it was in the 110 degree range and going outside felt like sticking your head inside a hot oven and taking a deep breath.

The Abaya
The standard issue abaya was plastic-wrapped and waiting for me on our dining room table the night we arrived. Traditional black with buttons down the front from the neck to the ankle, this polyester garment is not the most conducive to running errands in the extreme heat. Also, every time I would bend down to look at something on the bottom shelf of a store, my buttons would pop open and I’d find myself hurriedly snapping them back up lest someone get an eyeful on my shins. There are several abaya shops in the malls that have glamourous couture abayas with gold embroidery or ivory satin trim, and I plan on treating myself to one of these soon. In the meantime, I did buy an upgraded abaya at a little Saudi National Day festival in our compound. This one blessedly is a zip-front, so no more popping buttons. Yay! I have not covered my hair once since we’ve been here and it doesn’t seem to be an issue. There are loads of westerners living over here and I think Saudis are just used to seeing us.

The Compound
I can’t say it’s not more than a little weird, living in a compound but it’s also quite nice and convenient in many ways. It’s like living in a really small town that’s condensed into one little area. The athletic center is top notch, replete with an indoor running track and swimming pool. And because it’s within walking distance, the majority of residents take advantage of the facilities and this is the fittest group of teachers I’ve ever worked with. People ride around on tricycles, and use the baskets on the back to carry school supplies, groceries, and even their small children. That’s another thing - 90% of the teachers here have children. It’s like “what you do” here. I can’t complain that there is a full-service spa on compound that is open 6 days a week and takes evening appointments. I’ve only been once so far but it was lovely and I will be taking advantage of this amenity for sure.

There was a moment about 10 days in where I was walking the two blocks from the school campus to our villa when I felt a chokehold of anxiety grab me and I felt trapped inside a compound where I couldn’t leave, I couldn’t drive away if I wanted to and I was just stuck. But this passed. Now we make frequent trips “outside the walls” and the feelings of claustrophobia have faded away.

The School
We are about four weeks in and I can honestly say I’ve never been professionally pushed so hard in my career. The expectations are extremely high but the staff rises to them. There are no slackers here. There are teachers here who love their craft and are dedicated to pushing themselves and believe in education. I have also never felt so managed in my life, in terms of tasks and follow up, and it’s been a struggle for me to adjust to that. But I keep reminding myself that this school is great for a reason, and maybe it’s these practices that have contributed to that. So, I’m trying. But there are times I have to bite my tongue. My teaching team is brilliant, sarcastic, and a bit eccentric - the way good English teachers should be, and I’m enjoying the collegiality. The teachers here work very, very hard. But they party just as hard. Like most teachers, really.

Being Back in the Classroom
I think I had more anxiety about this then I did about living in Saudi Arabia. Having been six years removed from high school and five years removed from classroom teaching, I doubted myself a lot. I definitely had a few freak out moments in the days leading up to and during the first week of school. But Justin talked me down from the ledge and soon I got my groove back and got right back into the rhythm of the classroom. I suddenly realized how much I had been missing the day to day teaching interactions and the relationships with students. Honestly, I’m loving it and I’m happy staying put for now. The students are extremely respectful and more self-disciplined that what I’m used to. This is the most international school I’ve ever worked at. Our students are multicultural and multilingual and it is so fascinating teaching them all and seeing what a wide world view they have. And I love the content - reading, analyzing, discussing, and writing about literature is what led me to teaching to begin with. So it feels really great to get to be doing that again.

Shopping
There are more shopping malls here than you can count. And they are luxurious. Going to the malls is a “thing” to do. There are really nice restaurants and coffee shops, makeup and clothing stores, and we even saw one that had a rollercoaster inside. We’ve made a few trips to the malls and they offer many of the same brands we have at home. However, women are not allowed to try on clothes (we can’t have women getting undressed in public…). So, you either buy your clothes and take them into the bathroom where you can try them on and then return them right away if they don’t fit. Or, you just take your chances. I’m told in the Kingdom Tower mall there is a women’s only floor where you are allowed to try on clothes, but I haven’t been there yet.

The People
Honestly, we’ve been so busy settling in and planning for school that we have not had many interactions with locals yet. I do hope to make some Saudi friends and attend some events beyond the compound, but this may take some time. Store clerks have always treated me in a respectful and friendly way and almost everybody here speaks English, so it’s actually a lot easier getting around and getting things done here than it ever was in Ecuador.

I think that summarizes things well up to this point. I did go out on a ladies night dinner last week, and I will post about that soon. But as of now, I am feeling settled and professionally fulfilled. We’ve made some great friends. Everyone here is genuinely very nice and welcoming and I really can’t complain. We are quite comfortable and settling in nicely. I do miss my family a lot and I can really feel the distance at times. But I am happy to be here and I look forward to this new reality!